The last line should read "Do you have a pen I can borrow?" But that's all there is to the story.

I'm glad you and glynis enjoyed it. It was well received in my fiction-writing class, as well. It was a challenge at first to write the different characters using word choice and sentence structure only, but I think I got it in the final draft. So often in my work I'd relied on tags to show character differentiation. (An aggressive male said something, slamming his hand on his thigh. A teacher corrected the student, one eyebrow arching above the rim of her glasses.) This forced me to build characters' voices as carefully as I build their appearances. Even if the full character can't be seen to the reader, it has to be there for the writer. I have to know what the character would say, and why.

All right. I'm done rambling.

It's "schmuck". It's Yiddish for "jerk". I had a hard time spelling it until I started reading Harlan Ellison.

Interesting take on the piece - I didn't have any problems with his shift in language because I'd already decided he was a "playah" - he'd adjust himself to any situation, although he wasn't that great at it. In other words, once he'd decided his "natural charm" wasn't working, he switched to trying to sound literary and profound, and failed miserably, as a schmuck like him would. But I can see your point, too. Which means that someday, you may get attacked with one of my stories, because I'll want your perspective - so watch out, Jim! [:p]

Anyway. I think Nicole's done us a huge service here, because she's shown us what can be done without dialogue tags, and that we need to focus as much on what is said as how it's said. If we focus on the what, the how usually becomes automatic - no need to clutter anything up with raised eyebrows, slapped legs, and slammed doors at every sentence!

Bravo![:D]

QUOTE: Originally posted by nicoleroscrea
What's next on the topic list, all?


Let's see we've covered Death, Sex, War... Comma's, saids, ... Good, Evil.... Hmmm.

What about helper characters?

You know the ones who are there to get the protagonist from point a to b. Who pop up the that crucial bit of information or the much needed tool. They're the quiet one's who gladly wait in the wings as the head guy/gal gets all the attention. Any favorites from reading or writing?

Awesome! Tell him I know how he can top that - get Fforde to take you guys out to dinner someday! But in the meantime, an autograph will work.

Helper characters - excellent topic! They're underappreciated and deserve a bit of glory. The all-time classic is probably Watson, closely followed by Mycroft Holmes (wonder if that's where Fforde got the name?). But my favorite in fiction is Agatha Christie's Harley Quinn. If you guys love mysteries but haven't read her Harley Quinn stories, you should. They're eerily good. Too bad mine are still packed.[|(]

I should give some air time to one of my own big helpers: Special Agent Rick Barnes. The man's a saint. He gets all the crap work: the paperwork, the late hours, the fibbing to the boss - while Ray gets to dash off and save the world. Poor guy.

Now I feel guilty for not giving him more credit...[sigh]

I don't know if I would call Watson a helper character (although he's certainly the sidekick) because it's through his eyes that we witness Holmes at work. We share his experience and awe.

I try to put a lot of thought into my helper characters and not let them just exist purely to help the protagonist. They're built like the rest of us, with goals, dreams and feelings. Often my helpers are there to remind my protagonists they're human. My protagonists have a tendency to become obsessive to the point of insensitivity to the others around them.

Yes, it happened with John Adams Morgan. He'd originally been there to get my main character from DC to Seattle, and fill in a bit of background with her, and my friend Daisy got intrigued by him. No peace until I'd promised to bring him back in later in the novel!

Much luck!

Ah, Glynis, you would have to ask! [:D] John Adams is Dusty's grandfather. Indeed named for the President. Dusty's father (sadly deceased) was Thomas Jefferson Morgan, and one of her brothers is John Quincy (he goes by Jack). I'll refrain from listing every guy here - I'd fill up the forum!

(Side note: Anderson Cooper's finally back! Yipee!)

You brought up an interesting point: reader's favorites. That's one of the reasons why I have more than one person read for me - I know that different people will like different characters. It's interesting to see who they like the best, and why. Also very nice to know who they hate, and why. If three or four people hate your "sympathetic" main character, it's time to reconsider!

This may be an interesting problem for you guys to think about...

I have a scene where two very distinct, yet important, actions are about to take place. I have been switching POV between the two main characters since the beginning, but at this instance (they go in separate physical directions) I feel that what each is doing is important to show. How do you take your reader along the action of one and then revert to the recent past to show what the other is/was doing?

I have the point where the two come back together, and individual scenes of what the characters are accomplishing. Is it a matter of saying Meanwhile... like a comic, or do you have any suggestions of how to make this clear without too much narrative interference.

Robert Jordan is the master at this - I've seen him do it with several viewpoint characters, and he never uses narrative interference to bring us back to a point in time and another viewpoint. Of course, his books are all packed. [:(!] So I'm going purely from memory here, and I'm probably going to miss a couple of his techniques. But here goes:

1. A unifying event. He's used this technique many, many times. In Scene One from Viewpoint X, he shows X noticing some event that establishes the timeframe. For argument's sake, let's call it a ship on fire in the harbor. So X witnesses this, and goes off on his merry way for a length of time. Many scenes later, we leave X in peace and head over to, say, Scene Six with Viewpoint Y. Y witnesses the fire in the harbor, and so we know we're back to that time. Then we follow Y for several scenes, until X and Y meet up a few days later.

Variations on the theme are easy. If they're separated by miles of distance, you can use a storm, a headline, or something else they'd both have been privy to.

2. A common departure. If the characters were together before the split in the timeline, we see them part from X's viewpoint, and then follow X for several scenes. When it comes time to go back in time, Y shows us their parting again, and then we follow Y.

3. Oh, my, look at the time! Yeah, it's cheap, but people do notice the time, and you can have Y talk about the time at the beginning of Y's sequence.

Hope that helped!

Going back to reader reactions, I think my favorite so far was the group of people who read the prequel in its first draft. I had so much fun tweaking their opinion of Adrian, my assassin. Daisy hated him thoroughly for a long time, started to thaw toward him, and then ended up hating him again. She kept telling me as I was giving her chapters, "Please tell me they kill him! Or at least he ends up in jail - don't let him get away with this!" I, knowing the end, would just smile gnomically and say, "Wait and see." In the end, he walks away scott free. When I asked her if she was mad about that, she waved it off. "Oh, no, I'm glad he got away." So funny, considering Adrian himself had never changed - just reader perceptions of him.

Writing is a powerful thing indeed.